Why is it that people are so inconsiderate of my feelings? Some people just don’t know how to be considerate
You are having a conversation with a friend and like always they said something that deeply hurt. They knew about your situation and still they went ahead and made you wrong yet again.
There is something interesting to be noted here, and that is that perhaps the person was not speaking about you. Maybe they were speaking about someone else. Maybe they were not even making a comment that had to do with anyone just merely making a comment about something going on in that person’s life which had zero to do with you.
There are so many times when people who have been hurt in the past by those they were supposed to be able to trust — usually one or both of their parents, that they no longer trust anyone. As a result, they take things personally that are not personal, not in the least.
The greatest problem with personalizing things that are not personal is that one is offended by just about anything another says. It makes it difficult to build healthy relationships while building resentment for comments that never needed to be felt.
How does one deal with this issue?
Note how often you are with your friends and family and that feeling of being offended yet again comes up. You know that feeling if you are a person who personalizes things others say that is not personal to you.
Recognize the fact that healthy people are not going to censor every word they say to you to keep you from feeling hurt. They are just going about talking about their lives and have every right to do so in any given conversation as conversations are a ‘give and take.’
Take accountability for your own issues instead of laying them on the people who consider themselves your friends by listening more closely to what they said. And, do understand if someone says that they only have a couple of minutes to talk, respect that because they may have an important meeting to get to or a work deadline to be met. This is called being respectful.
Remember that relationships ought to be fun and caring.
Nobody is responsible for how your feel but you. Choose to be engaged in the conversation and decide to let the statement pass. You may very well come to the conclusion later on that you really did overreact in that situation and maybe many similar ones.