Are You Attractive to Others?
Today we are going to speak about what makes a person attractive to another, because from what I can tell many people really give this very little thought.
First of all, one needs to be physically attractive in that they are clean and smelling good. This doesn’t involve a bunch of fake perfumes, as much as to be cleansed as in bathed or showered. The best smell a person can be attracted to of another is their natural smell — when they are clean. That is when the pheromones will play their role of attraction.
Second, look approachable. There are so many clients of mine who wonder why they are either looked down upon are gazed at. If they were to look at themselves in the mirror and note the manner in which they are tattooed up, have rings in their noses, etc they would understand that they have made themselves be an object to be looked at or feared depending on the take of the other person. I am not making a judgment here — I am speaking reality. The manner in which one adorns themselves in these manners speaks loudly of who they are without words needing to be said. If you don’t like the way you are being treated, look at yourself in the mirror and maybe it will become a bit more obvious to you…just saying…
Along with the above, the clothes that one wears do matter. I know that ripped jeans and tight clothes are what people are wearing these days. However, one could take a look at what the underlying message is in wearing these clothes and maybe rethink the message you are sending. Classy clothes can be found in consignment shops — some of my favorite ones have been — so no need to believe one need go broke to look nice with properly fitting clothes that allow your personality to stand out.
Third, is to be a kind person to yourself first, meaning that you are not full of self-deprecating commentary, rather you speak of those things of interest to yourself and those things that you have achieved and are working to achieve — your dreams and aspirations in this life and why they are important to you.
Fourth, to be a kind person to others in being interested in what they are doing and caring about how they are doing. Remember for most people that the most important thing to them is themself and by all means, use their given name when speaking to them because one’s name is their favorite word — period (unless you have a nickname and you like it because it makes you feel special)!
Fourth, be fun and playful. So often people take themselves so seriously and that takes all the fun out of being with them. We all need a bit of fun and levity in our lives.
Fifth, be present for the other person in terms of your time and attention. There is no need to have a cell phone out and is being used if you are with another person. This other person has taken the time to be with you, so the least you can do is return the favor and in so doing demonstrating that you are there with them — and that no one else is going to interfere with that time you are sharing. I actually did a qualitative study for my previous master’s degree in Medical Sociology where I sat at a cafe and noted the interactions that the people at the tables with me were having and all but one table had phones out. These people weren’t even engaged with the person or people sitting with them. This is why our interactions have gone to a point of almost not being there and why people feel so alone in the world. Few people know how to be completely engaged with the person in front of them — eye-to-eye and soul-to-soul — the phone always being the distraction. If you want someone to notice and care about you, best you give them that same courtesy. When I am out with anyone, my phone is usually in my handbag and nowhere near the table. If we were able to get along without our phones being on us all the time during the first half of my life, I figure it is possible and even better to be able to be without my phone interfering with my in-person interactions with those who have chosen to spend their time with me. I also let them know that my phone is not present so that I can put all my attention on them and offer for them to do the same. Most often the people I am with are more than willing to do likewise.
Learning: If you want to attract someone who is attractive to you, best you be attractive to yourself first, and then you will become attractive to those you would like to attract to you based on your physical, emotional, and mental presence.
If you are a person who is wondering why you can’t find ‘the one’ I am running a 3-day retreat at the beautiful Villa Serena Holistic Hotel in the Dominican Republic October 2 -4, 2021. You can get more information here:
https://dawningvisions.com/upcoming-events/
It is going to be a fun and life-changing event for you!
